• After months of denials by spokespeople, Madonna and husband Guy Ritchie made it official–they announced Wednesday that they are divorcing after 8 years of marriage.  There are financial details to work out, since Madge is worth about a half-billion dollars and Ritchie, well, isn’t….
• Billboard magazine reports that Britney Spears is definitely hitting the road next spring after cutting a tour deal with AEG Live, that it will be international, and visit midsize venues rather than theatres or stadiums.  It sounds like another carefully-planned step made by her father, which proves that all celebrity parents aren’t publicity-seeking boobs that are painfully unaware of their childrens’ problems–but enough about Brit’s mom…
• Tina Fey still doesn’t know if she’ll return to Saturday Night Live this weekend to do her spot-on Sarah Palin impression–but CNN says that Palin herself will be a guest on the show.  Wow–maybe Palin will do her Tina Fey impression…
• MTV’s Total Request Live, or TRL, says a final farewell November 16 and Beyonce will be there to mark the moment, telling the show Monday during an appearance that she owes a lot of success to them–both for her and Destiny’s Child.  Maybe she’ll get husband Jay-Z to buy it and start his own channel–you know, Jigga TV…
• The mystery is over surrounding whatever was ailing Janet Jackson to force her to postpone 9 dates on her Rock Witchu tour–her reps announced Tuesday that she was diagnosed with a rare type of migraine-induced vertigo, but she’s receiving treatment and returned to performing Wednesday night in Washington DC. It must be great for her to resume her tour, and to realize that her only big headache isn’t brother Michael…
•  ohn McCain tried to make peace with David Letterman Thursday night, telling the late-night host that "I screwed up" by canceling an earlier appearance on the show, then endured some pretty sharp questioning by Letterman about his campaign and Sarah Palin.  I think afterwards, he probably would have preferred a debate with Hillary Clinton…

How I Met Your Mother star Neil Patrick Harris told People magazine that there is an opportunity for Britney Spears to return to the sitcom, saying, "The door is open for her. We would love [guest stars] who get in the show’s world to stick around if they want to."  The really weird part of it is that it makes her seem more normal to be a TV star…

Usher’s new CD Here I Stand is standing atop Billboard’s album chart, where it debuted with first-week sales of nearly a half-million.  Mr. Raymond says he doesn’t really care if it doesn’t sell, "a bazillion-gazillion records"–it’s just rewarding to get the album’s message out…

Miley Cyrus’ papa Billy Ray says that paparazzi salivating over the $150,000 they could get for a photo of her first kiss are too late–only he won’t say who it was.  It’s probably because of the settlement agreement he made after clobbering the kid…

Entertainment Tonight is looking a little foolish after falsely reporting Angelina Jolie gave birth to twins last week–based on information that came from an imposter posing as Jolie’s assistant.  For TV’s oldest and best-known celebrity news show, it’s kinda like catching your dad with your Aunt Velma…

Former Tonight Show sidekick and long-time pitchman Ed McMahon is facing foreclosure on his Hollywood home after falling behind on his mortgage payments.  Maybe he can move in with Doc Severinsen…

ABC’s The View will welcome Michelle Obama–wife of Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama–as a guest host June 18, where she will participate in the show’s "Hot Topics" segment and interview guests.  Hopefully she won’t have to explain to Elisabeth Hasselbeck why she doesn’t dress like other Muslim women…

• American Idol winner David Cook admitted on Live With Regis and Kelly yesterday morning that Season Two contestant Kimberly Caldwell went on a date with him recently, and that he hoped to do it again.  He says they can bond over their shared experience on the show–and their mutual desire to torture Simon Cowell…
• Leona Lewis says British tabloid reports of her being engaged to her long-time boyfriend are not true, but she added that he’s still "the one" and he’s "happy and excited" about her success at home and around the world.  The fact that he’s an electrician might help–there’s really no discount bin for conduit wiring…
• Ne-Yo told Billboard magazine he was surprised when asked to submit a song for a new album that Lindsay Lohan was working on, but added he was surprised to learn she did "a ridiculously fabulous job" on the tune.  When it comes to ridiculous, LiLo has the market cornered…
• Mariah Carey is in Japan, where she will throw out the first pitch at a baseball game in the Tokyo Dome–it’s because the TV network airing the game is using a song from her new E=MC2 album as its theme song.  Will someone have to explain to Mimi that this pitch is a low fastball, not a high C?
• The reports of Kelly Clarkson working on a new CD are true, and she’s getting some help from OneRepublic lead singer Ryan Tedder–who not only has penned hits for his own band but co-wrote Leona Lewis’ huge Bleeding Love.  It’s a move that her label boss Clive Davis would approve–and in Kelly’s case, perhaps he did…
• Sharon Stone surprised and bewildered many with comments she made during the Cannes Film Festival that the earthquakes in China were "bad karma" because of the government’s treatment of Tibet.  One of the nation’s theater chains there says it will boycott her films–which would be a real blow if she was actually making any that anyone was watching…

• How different is Taylor Swift from most of today’s young and wild celebrites?  She admitted recently that she hasn’t kissed a boy in 2 years–the others, maybe 2 minutes…
• Britney Spears’ dad Jamie will continue to have conservatorship over his daughter until at least July 31, and the court in the case ordered her estate to provide him a leased car and pay him $2500 a week in salary.   However, he won’t be vested in the 401K or profit sharing until he’s been on the job as her parent for at least a year…
• Rihanna’s efforts to help a New York City mother of two find a bone marrow transplant donor may have paid off, as People magazine is reporting that she has found a candidate.  Rihanna spoke to People recently about the woman’s plight, and thousands of readers reportedly responded to a national marrow donation center….
• Madonna has admitted in an interview that she didn’t even know where Malawi was until she adopted a child from the African nation.  Now that she’s produced a documentary about the plight of its orphans, she’ll likely be an ardent spokesperson for their cause–at least until she finds some other place Angelina Jolie hasn’t been…
• Whitney Houston is readying a new album now that is expected out by year’s end, and her label boss Clive Davis says the project won’t bow to popular hip-hop trends, adding, "The public wants Whitney Houston material’.  So–we’re basically looking at new versions of the Star Spangled Banner and I Will Always Love You…
• Flo Rida’s 10-week stay at the top of the Billboard Hot 100 with Low is over, as Usher’s new single Love In This Club  took a 50-point jump to #1.  Those "apple-bottom jeans" will be shakin’ to a new tune…

• Flo Rida’s smash Low has now spent 10 weeks at number one on Billboard’s Hot 100–longer than anyone since Beyonce’s Irreplaceable.  In other words, Low is high…
• OneRepublic, who just wrapped up a tour, will be back on the road this spring with the Crocs Next Step Campus Tour.  Check out the dates and places they’ll be performing on their official website…
• Madonna has gone on the record about the recent troubles of young celebrities like Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan, saying , "I do feel for them, but I think we’re all responsible for it as well. We buy the magazines. We are hungrily devouring all the information. So we all have to take responsibility for it."  What’s the chance she considers herself royalty and now refers to herself as "we"?
• Paula Abdul shared some details about her new album with People magazine, saying it will include new versions of up to a half-dozen of her #1 songs plus 5 new tunes.  For example, her hit Cold Hearted Snake will be given new lyrics all about Simon Cowell…
• Jack Nicholson has come out in support of Hillary Clinton in an Internet video featuring Jack in clips from several of his movies interspersed with graphics promoting Clinton’s strengths.  Ofiicially, the Clinton campaign says they didn’t authorize the endorsement; unofficially, Hillary’s staff can’t get her away from the computer…
• Simon Cowell says he was offered $2 million to be the new face of Viagra but turned it down, calling it a "f***ing insult".  I imagine anyone intimate with Simon saying the same thing…